My friend gave birth to me !!

Growing up in a highly orthodox setup, I was disciplined to keep distance with everyone and also to keep up my dignity. I was trained well to be haughty and arrogant and it was a sin if I had a chat with the maid. Well. Let me tell you...I was Daddy’s darling, Mamma’s pet and the Family Icon...!

 

When I was in my ninth grade, special care was taken to delicately tuck me into a car at 9 am with the driver and one of my uncles sitting in front... With me peeping out the window to look at a world which always sped away from me at 60 km / hr.

I loved boogie dancing and was too good at it... But Lo!! My grandpa did not. …But I loved my grandpa...And he was more important to me than dancing…So I danced behind the tightly closed doors of my room.

My teachers were good friends of my family . And so…I accidently came up first in all the competitions I went for…That was injustice to my really talented friends…I loved my friends ….So I said Goodbye to competitions…My friends were more important to me than me winning competitions.

I loved singing...but my granny felt  it was nt apt for children from good families to shout like buffaloes at home....So I restricted my singing to the Soprano classes I had once a week …I loved granny so much and she was more important to me than singing…

I loved sports and was pretty good at it too …but my family didn’t want those rowdies cheering at their little darling..…I let go of sports cos I loved my family….My family was more important to me than sports.

I liked to go to the beach. Little boys and girls played in the beach sand while I sat on the big  cloth spread out for me so that my lovely satin dress would not get spoiled. I would have given everything I had…..just to play in the sand…just to make a sand castle…. Just to squish the sand once with my bare foot.  But of course … I was assured that those children playing on the beach were not as lucky as me!!!

Finally…I loved loneliness … and no one seemed to take it away from me!! I was happy I had lots of freedom in my room …and no one to break the silence…..

I sailed on this way for a long time ....when I had the honor and privilege of meeting one precious person who became a beacon of light for me and I started seeking his help every step of the way.

Caterpillar that I was , afraid of light even...always in my cocoon ...this person worked wonders through his advices....He taught me to think !! To fight for existence !! I think I need to say a few words about this wayfarer...


This loner never knew to smile ..He never was kind to unfaithfullness and pretense....was not all that loving to ignorance .....He was kind of a fighting bull.....fighting against injustice, fighting against  what ever he felt was wrong, losing his temper at the slightest note of distaste.....His strong personality and individuality inspired me....to be like him....I never had fought with anyone and he knew he had to shake me out of my cocoon and wouldnt have minded bursting it open to get me out of it !

And finally one day I burst my cocoon to pieces and came out , a wonderful butterfly...I knew I could fly high without anyone to help me ..I knew  I could travel far cos I found the hidden strength within me...

I have been doing lots since then... all on my own... I let go of my prejudices..my fears...my superstitions...I emerged into a completely different person whom everyone could look up to... In fact he gave birth to me ...The  real new me who did not live "only" for others but also for me !!

Everyone was surprised at the change in me...The shy person who could not  once drive around alone in my car had come out as an independent Iron butterfly  who could address masses and drove around for miles on social issues not fearing my ties !!! In fact I love my freedom so much now and people respect me for my individuality....... I feel I am born again !

And I dedicate this to my friend who gave birth to me... Who helped me find the real me !

JennyPadua,Nagercoil,TamilNadu,India,JeniPadua

Emotionally mature newborns?

What I write is something very personal.

And the views that I share here is what I feel and I mean what I write...

This time i need to write about something I feel is quite a mystery .

The birth of a baby has always intrigued me. Until the baby remains inside the womb,

he breathes and is being fed through the cord which connects him to his mother. He swims about in a fluid medium where the fluid goes into his nostrils and mouth. He doesnt cry or fret that its dark inside. He doesnt complain even when it is cold and he is lonely. He lives the life of a sage.The moment the cord is cut, the baby becomes an independent and intelligent person who knows to adapt to the new environment he is placed in.

He suddenly knows to use his nose for breathing and also to smell. He uses his mouth to feed and also to cry and smile at everyone. The baby who was living in a fluid medium inside the womb, suddenly knows to live in a gaseous medium.

He knows he can open his eyes to wink away the dust and light and also to view and enjoy Gods creations. He uses his little fingers to touch, to feel ,to hold on to his mother. He also knows he can use his legs to kick away things which come his way.

He knows to cry when he is hungry or is in pain and also to smile when he is happy and content.

 

The reason why I drag on is to get to the point that the baby who is zero hours old is intelligent enough to  adapt to strange situations in a matter of minutes. 

What confuses me is the same baby when is undergoing the process of growing up , cannot adapt emotionally. Even when he comes to a ripe age, say 80 yrs, when a man says he is experienced, still he wouldn’t know how to react to people and circumstances in the right way, loses his temper, gets hurt, withdraws into himself, or becomes hyperactive, becomes an introvert or an extrovert and many are worse than mad men. Don’t you think this is odd?

We say life is a process of continous learning . But what exactly do we learn if we would not learn to control our emotions even ? Well....I personally find this a controversy .

Is it because the body is more adaptable than our mind ? or  because the mind is weaker than our body ? When the body can adapt efficiently at zero years , even to the worst conditions but still the mind refuses to adapt to the minutest difficulty even at old age, don’t you  wonder why ? Do we control emotions or emotions control us ? They say " Anger and Love are the spice of life" But its always too much anger and a lot less of love.

So i feel it is unconditional love that gets lost when we grow older ? the baby knows only to love and he has not a pinch of selfishness in him. so his mind and body can adapt to people and situations ? but  men cannot because they become selfish and crave for materialistic and monetary benefits which make them unadaptable and unacceptable ?  

If the new born baby could speak he would have told us how he felt when he was inside the mothers womb . He would have told us how he feels outside ... BABY'S FIRST DAY OUT ???

I feel its because we cant adjust and adapt because  "we wont " because "we dont want to" ???

Well....Strange ????

Personally,  I feel I have a lot of "IF's"  ...

If everyone could smile at the worst situations…

If everyone could laugh off an argument which hurts…

If everyone could smile at somebody’s mistakes without jesting..

If everyone could withhold false interpretations..

If people could change their temperament …

If people could learn to stop backbiting..

If people could love unconditionally..

If people would stop hurting others …

DON’T YOU THINK THE WORLD WOULD HAVE BEEN A BETTER PLACE

IF ONLY WE COULD………

JennyPadua,Nagercoil,TamilNadu,India,JeniPadua